Friday, July 30, 2010

Michael Cera: Serial Photo-Bomber

This guy is a mastermind. This page has a ton of celebrity photobombs, but no one shows up on the list more than Michael Cera. I'm just completely blown away by this. Furthermore, are photobombs really that successful anymore? You can instantly see the picture on digital cameras...seems like a dangerous past time for a celebrity.

Look, this is just undeniable proof that Michael Cera is an asshole. An asshole that plays the same asshole in every movie. That sweet, lovable asshole.

This one is my particular favorite. First of all, the couple is kind of adorable together. Second of all HE'S SO SNEAKY. LOOK AT THAT.

Poor awkward dude with awkward birds. Never stood a chance against the awkward king.

Anyways, this got me thinking, maybe Michael Cera's been in MY pictures and I didn't notice? It's happened so many times you know?


Thursday, July 29, 2010

For the Record, I Expect Nothing Less From Kanye West

What are bands accomplishing from boycotting Arizona? Are the legislators going to be so hurt by not being able to see Maroon 5 in concert in Arizona? Does the state of Arizona really suffer from lack of bands performing live in their state?

And howabout boycotting all of the states that have refused to pass gay marriage?


This is a fantastic reason to never listen to celebrities when it comes to politics. Especially when they try to take an asinine stand like this. I bet some of these bands didn't want to boycott but were bullied in to it. How many of them actually fully understand everything in the bill? Why do celebrities think that being famous means they should be political?

I think if I was famous then I would never reveal my politics. It's alienating to a lot of my fan base. I want to bring entertainment to people, and I want them to enjoy it without feeling like I have something against them. I wonder how it must feel to be a fan of someone and what they do, either acting, singing, or any kind of art, and then find out they are very against things you believe in. Do they still appreciate you as a fan? How could you enjoy what they produce without the feeling that they don't like you, or that their anti-whatever sentiment is more than just political, it's personal? The things they say often feel pretty personal.

I'm a fan of civil discourse. Erik and I disagree politically on a lot of things, but honestly as I type that I don't know how true it is any more. Through our discussions, we have found a lot of common ground. That's because we don't argue to win, we argue to find the truth. We understand where we're both coming from, and that sort of understanding does not come from statements like "Republicans/Democrats are stupid." Whenever anyone starts a sentence like "Those Republicans/Democrats..." I cringe. Grouping everybody under one lump sum and assuming they're all this or that or think this or that is unfair and immediately puts people on the defense. Now you're not arguing to come up with a solution, you're arguing to the death.

So when celebrities take what I so often assume is an ignorant and knee-jerk reactions, like not touring in Arizona because of a bill they want to pass, I get angry. This doesn't accomplish anything politically, it just hurts your fans. It not only hurts your fans because they won't get to see you, it hurts the fans who disagree with you. It's a betrayal to the money and support they've given you. And honestly, it's a betrayal to the fans who feel more strongly about other issues, like gay marriage. How do you justify not touring in Arizona when gay people are not equal citizens in most of the United States? What makes this issue worthy or your time, and not the others?

I say Arizona fans boycott music. Show them that you don't want to hear their opinions, you want to hear their music, but if you have to hear their opinions, then you won't bother with their music. You're more than the politics of the state you happen to live in.

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Wish-List Wednesday!

I don't know that I'm really crazy about Lady Gaga, but the hype is infectious.

This shirt:

Except it's an exorbitant amount of money and on principle I don't know how I feel about buying things from a website that crashed 10 times while I just tried to GET to this shirt.

This shirt:
Lady Gaga T-Shirt I'm A Free Bitch, Baby!
It's just bright and offensive enough that even if you don't know that it's a Lady Gaga quote, it gives off the same feel.

This shirt:
Perez Hilton - GAGA Is My Bitch Unisex Black Fine Jersey Tee - T-Shirt
I don't even get it, but it's so ridiculous and feeding in to the hype! NEEEEEED. Plus it's from Perez, so it'll make me all hipster-y and cool.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Redefining Normalcy

When I was diagnosed, I knew as little as an 11-year-old girl can possibly know about diabetes. My mom obviously knew more, as she'd at least recognized the symptoms before it got to the "throwing up on your death bed" stage. Needless to say, the three days I was in the hospital were a huge learning curve. Needles (oh so many needles). Science (anatomy and physiology before I'd taken Biology or Chemistry. woo). Technology (so I just put the blood into this bit of plastic and the machine tells me how much sugar is in it? ....wat?). Emotions (they seriously need to cover this better).

My parents decided to kind of split up the duties, make everything easier. I use the term easy loosely, obviously. Dad took over the numbers in a very engineering fashion. He figured out how much insulin I needed, recorded my blood sugars, dealt with the doctors. My mom took over nutrition, counting carbs and planning meals.

The one thing that was most important to my parents, however, was to maintain normalcy. They believed whole-heartedly that the best way to handle this was to bulldoze over it and laugh in its face. This was great for me, because I hardly felt like I'd really been diagnosed with a disease. In fact, the extra attention was kind of cool.

And then that Christmas I got a pity laptop. All was well.

Looking back, though, I kind of wish we hadn't pretended that everything was still normal, that nothing had really changed. While emotionally it was certainly a lot easier, I think I still try to convince myself that I'm normal.

"No, I can definitely have three bagels in the morning. That's fine."

"You're having a CUPCAKE PARTY? Yes, please."

"You guys are going to go play soccer for 6 hours? Sure, let me just leave my juice and tester in my room, far away from the field."

I know us diabetics say we can do everything anyone else can do. And that's true. But I always forget the asterisk: I can do everything, but it's sure as hell going to be harder. We say we can have cake at the birthday party, that we can play in all these varsity sports, that we can go abroad and travel. We can. But not without giving ourselves a lot of insulin and hoping it will be enough, or profusely testing out blood sugars with a gallon of juice on hand, or packing an entirely separate suit case for all of our supplies.

I think my main struggles with diabetes are tied to my inherent belief that I can do all these things. I really think I can eat whatever I want.

I've come to the decision that yes, in theory, I can. But practically I know the bagel is going to make my blood sugar 300 later in the day no matter if I give myself 3 units or 30. My parents tried so hard to let me believe that nothing can hold me back, and they were right. But it's taken me a long time to learn the responsibility that comes along with wanting to do everything.

I'm not "normal." I'm just not. Fact is, when I eat food, unlike everyone else, I give myself insulin. When I run, I carry a juice with me. Every three days, I do an infusion set change. Ignoring these things and pretending they don't change anything has been hurtful to my health. I'm different. I'm diabetic. And so help me god, I just can't eat bagels, no matter what my stomach thinks.

Monday, July 26, 2010

I Haven't Bragged About Erik in a While.

"You’re pretty every day. Even if you’re wearing something that isn’t my favorite style, I look at you and think “Wow. She is so pretty.” Every time you look at me I’m a little bit stunned by how pretty you are. Every time, without exception or hyperbole."

I would never encourage girls to find guys so they can validate their prettiness. It's bad habit, and honestly won't fix anything unless you truly believe it yourself. And so often these compliments feel empty. Any other guy, I'd be tempted to think he was just trying to get in my pants, or sick of listening to me babble about my insecurities (though to be fair, I rarely if ever do that), or is just saying it because he thinks "he has to."

But this is Erik, and not a single one of those thoughts occurred to me. No, quite honestly, after reading this, I was humbled so greatly to think that he was dating me. At the same time, I felt fabulous and wonderful, because I knew if I wasn't there's no way he'd waste his time on me. He's efficient like that.

I'm a little bit stunned I found someone as awesome as him.

For The Lulz: An Evaluation

Hello dear readers, nothing profound to report at the moment (though I may put up a post later). Right now I want to talk to you about my little blog here, and how much I think it has grown.

It started off humble, though I tackled some pretty big topics early on (like the creation museum). I've really enjoyed practicing my writing above all else, something I don't get to do enough on this campus. I've vented and explored ideas that I've had. And I've made the occassional joke. I even stirred up some surprising controversy and discussion, which, all things said and done, was pretty cool.

I've pulled from some of my favorite blogs in terms of style and for inspiration. Those blogs, in case you're wondering: The Bloggess (even Erik enjoys her humor, so I feel confident most of you will too), Blag Hag, Cracked, Mike Rowe.

I got a counter for my little corner of the web last week, just curious to see what kind of traffic I'm getting. I expected to maybe get 50 hits within the week, but as of this writing I'm up to 158 (Full discretion: probably 20-ish hits of those are me). I won't exactly declare myself an internet celebrity, but this says to me that I've got a somewhat regular following! Which is more than I ever expected! Wooo!

You might be able to tell from the title (which was kind of a throw-away) that this blog is completely theme-less. I plan on keeping it that way because it allows me to write whatever the heck I feel like without betraying the readers in terms of expectation. However, like Wish-List Wednesday, there are regular sort of posts I've been thinking about doing. And I also considered changing the name to something more meaningfull and less....throw-away. I'd like to consult the potentially ten readers that I have (and maybe a few strangers that wander by) for their opinion regarding these matters.

But I get full veto power. So don't think you're going to be sending me to North Korea any time soon. :P

My themed, semi-regular post ideas:
-Why I don't like Nicolas Cage
-How to be a Total Asshole (And Get Away With It)
-The Voice of Our Generation: Kanye West Quotes
-A Look Into the Life of a Diabetic
-Things You'll Never See on Oprah but Totally Should
-More Series (Like Nomnomnom)

I'm putting up a poll on the site, so if you're viewing this through your google reader, please stop by and let me know what you think. Or make a new suggestion in the comments. A new poll for blog title ideas will be up when I think this poll is done. Which could be tomorrow or two months from now.

Sunday, July 25, 2010

What I Thought of Inception

It was basically this..

Except more like this..

Saturday, July 24, 2010

I Don't Like Twilight, But I Will Defend Your Right to Like it to the Death!

I don't like it when people try to make me feel bad for liking certain things. I experience this frequently, so it's a really sore point. Yes, I like: Harry Potter, Battlestar Galactica, pop music, Spongebob Squarepants, and Pokemon. The real kicker is that these are things I've been made fun of for in the past, but I could probably be made fun of for liking ANYTHING. Zelda. Mean Girls. Glee. Jonas Brothers (I've gotta support my diabetic brethren).

It's why I'm careful about how I criticize Twilight. Some people like it and that's okay. I'm not crazy about it, but that doesn't mean EVERYONE has to dislike it. What I don't like is the girls who get obsessed about it, viewing the relationship as something they have to have, but that's for a different post.

I mean really, though, what is this, Junior High? Everyone who wears Abercrombie and Fitch is a prep, everyone who likes Simple Plan is a punk or a poser? So someone likes something you don't, why do you have to go and make them feel shitty about it? Someone's different than you: GO PICK ON THEM. Fantastic.

Newsflash: 1950's are over. We can have differently colored houses and everything now!

Sure people do this in jest, but it doesn't hide the fact that I'm different and now I'm paying the price. I like Battlestar Galactica and yes, dammit, I was pissed at the ending. I get it Losties. I didn't like Lost, but you did and that's okay. We can mope about our series' mutual shitty endings together.

And if all you watch on TV is Keeping up with the Kardashians then that's okay because I can understand enjoying laughing at rich people! THEY'RE FUNNY. Maybe you just like Soap Operas. THAT'S OKAY TOO. Drama is entertaining.

Something everybody should have learned in kindergarten: some people are different than you, and there's nothing you can do about it. Instead of making everyone feel shitty for it, let's just grab a beer and enjoy each other's diverse company.

Okay, probably didn't grab beers in kindergarten. Change that to juice box.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Because Bigotry is Funny

I'm really enjoying the gratuitous amounts of apostrophes. Also I'm confused why they feel so strongly about emos? And sophisticated swine? Apparently also, if you're straight but "effeminate" you still love the devil. At least they're progressive enough to understand that feminists and "loud mouth women" are not necessarily the same thing.

Wish-List Wednesday!

This week, I want one thing, and one thing only:

A rainbow in your freaking hands. How fantastic is this? Definitely file this under "this is not a want, it's a need."

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

A God I Can Get Behind

Lately I've stumbled a lot of short stories about the meaning of life, God's true purpose, and what lies beyond death. They're very short and not all that deep, so I encourage everybody to check my favorites out: "Meeting God", "Talking to God" and "I don't know, Timmy, being God is a big responsibility."

I like the first two stories because of their emphasis on growth. I feel like religion all too often makes life feel stagnant. These are your rules, this is what you have to do and can't do to get in to heaven. You live your pious, and, for some people, boring life and then you spend an eternity with God. The end is the purpose. These stories, however, propose that the journey is the purpose. Our whole reason for being is to learn and grow.

"Meeting God" goes so far as to presume that humanity is one and literally interprets that harm to one person is harm to all. Which is a good argument for why we should not hurt each other.

"Talking to God" uses a stronger emphasis on evolution, saying it's our species that must learn. It's possible to create technology and not kill ourselves, we just have to hope that we can. It means we have to trust each other and learn to live with each other. We cannot use the technology for harm, but we still need to have the capability to do so. It was a great spin on technology and scientific advancements and the both negative and positives outcomes. Technology is always going to have bad along with good with new discoveries and inventions, but in order to progress as a society we need to learn to live with them.

"I don't know, Timmy, being God is a big responsibility" is much different from the first two. More scifi than ontological. But it did pose an interesting perspective on what our lives really may be.

I think stories like these are enjoyable, they give me an idea of God that I could get behind. There's a real purpose, and God, as an intellectual, is more relatable. He doesn't interfere in all the stupid aspects of our lives or stop bad things from happening because those parts are what make us who we are. It makes sense that it wouldn't be right for God to interfere with that. Our lives are not a means to an end, the whole purpose is the journey itself. It's a logical God. I totally support that.

Sunday, July 18, 2010

How to: Dress Like Lady Gaga

I don't consider this a craft blog or a celebrity blog, I actually don't consider it an ANYTHING blog. But Katie and I have been tossing around ideas about how to dress like Lady Gaga for Halloween, and I thought I'd share some of them.

The Bubble Suit

Just blow these REALLY REALLY REALLY fast. Note: May make it difficult to hold conversations at a party. Or eat.

The Crime Scene Tape

Find a local crime scene and run around like crazy. Eventually you will be covered in the police tape style of Lady Gaga.

The Beer Can Hairdo

Grab 30 of your closest friends and go drinking. One of you will wake up looking like this.

As you can see, Lady Gaga's high fashion is a little difficult and too coutoure for most of us to attain, but with a little ingenuity, you too can be as fabulous as she is.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

And Mother Nature Will Be Like "Slooooow Doooown"

I'm 20-years-old, female, and in a long-term relationship. Facebook has decided it's time I get married:


It's bad enough that a bunch of my friends are getting married and the reaction from the general public is "Congratulations!" not "..oh." Am I really that old? Is this ACTUALLY happening?

Don't even get me started on how some of my friends are pregnant. PREGNANT. My uterus just got angry at me. It ALSO thought I was not yet supposed to be pregnant. Now it knows it can be. Now it's upset with me for not trying harder in this endeavor. hfdsahf.

This completely blows my mind. Please don't misinterpret this rant, it's not that I'm looking down on other people's life choices. If they're happy, fine. I just somehow missed the memo on how old I was and how it's legitimate for people my age to be having families.

I'm not ready for this. I tend to think of myself as relatively mature, yet apparently everyone else is light years ahead of me when it comes to life planning. I don't even know what I want to do with my life, let alone plan weddings and get cribs. Ahhh it makes my head want to blow up.

I really did think I wouldn't have to deal with the, "When are you getting married?" questions until I was at least thirty. Facebook has proved me wrong multiple times before ("No, I don't consider myself a stalker!") and this is just once more.

Please someone pause my life for a moment. I need a breather.

Friday, July 16, 2010

Reason #25475298345 I don't Like Nicolas Cage

Read this article, look me in the eye, and tell me you can take Nicolas Cage seriously as an actor.

You can't do it.

No one can do it.


And now I want to go see Sorcerer's Apprentice. Welcome to the movie industry. Also, I think this is all proof that catnip really is a gateway drug.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Stop Making it Something That it's Not.

I'm sure you've all seen some variation of this quote, be it a facebook version or otherwise. This particular quote irritated me with the final, "That shut her up."

Quick lesson: rephrasing the problem in a way that seems witty and funny does not negate the problem or make the person who points it out less correct. You didn't shut her up, you proved her point by showing how insensitive you are to the issue.

"Stop being a shitty lock."

I would like to quarrel with the idea that women are supposed to be locks, that virginity is something that needs to be locked up and protected. This isn't the middle ages, a woman is not worth more if she hasn't had sex. Being a virgin does not make someone more moral, or "pure," or better than other people. It just means she hasn't had sex.

Funny how you could have just looked that up in Webster's.

If a woman does not want to have sex with a man, it's not because she is keeping herself locked up. She has not "maintained" her virtue, she has not won the age-old battle of men versus women. She has simply decided that she does not want to engage in sex with this man. Maybe it's because she doesn't have a condom and does not want to risk STDs. Maybe it's because she has to get up for work the next day. Maybe it's because she doesn't want to have sex with men she is not in love with. Maybe she's just genuinely not attracted to him.

Regardles of the reason, viewing her as the victor is unhealthy. Now the man leaves dejected, emasculated and less of a man. See how this depiction is starting to look unfavorable for BOTH parties involved?

If the woman did want to have sex, she did not lose her virtue or become a slut. Consenting parties both get to have fun and feel good. What's so bad about that?

Also, this completely ignores the possibility of a woman seeking out a man for sex. A man can say no and still be a man, and a woman can ask for sex without being a slut.

We expect everyone to fit into this incredibly small and constricting boxes of "gender" that leaves a surprisingly large amount of people out. That's not good for anyone, even the people who somehow manage to attain those ridiculous standards.

Sex isn't a game. No lock, no key, just two people of equal worth and value having a healthy and enjoyable time.

In the words of the atheist bus ads, "Now stop worrying and enjoy your life."

Friday, July 9, 2010

Hollywood Should Start with Not Making Re-Makes, Though

The media obsession over actors has completely ruined movies. I can't watch a movie now without thinking, "lol he peed his pants once lololol." (I refuse to acknowledge whether or not I ACTUALLY think like this >.>)

It's not about the movies, the stories, the entertainment. It's about how one time Mel Gibson was drunk driving and called the cop that pulled him over "sugar tits." It's about how Tom Cruise is a scientologist and let's his 5-year-old daughter dress him. It's about how Jodie Foster was the inspiration for some guy to try and kill Ronald Reagan. And kind of seems like she might be a lesbian.

Despite all this, I really enjoy celebrity gossip. Something about the lives of the rich and famous is intriguing. Maybe I feel a little vicarious about the whole thing. Picking apart Kristin Stewart for choosing such a terrible Chanel gown. Berating Miley Cyrus for such a sexy dance routine in front of millions of people. They're so easy to judge, and they live such fabulous lives.

But it really does mean that the quality of the entertainment is diminished. It's always going to be obscured by the OTHER story going on. Brad Pitt cheated on Jennifer Aniston with Angelina Jolie while he filmed Mr. and Mrs. Smith? Do you think I really watched that movie? Hell no.

I'll NEVER be able to watch a Lindsey Lohan movie the same way ever again. I don't even know where to begin with the Lohan story.

You hear about how celebrities hate the obsession, and I think some of them genuinely do. But the fact is that the industry is built around the obsession. The stars go on promotional tours for the movie, which would be completely useless if no one cared to hear about the people behind the movie. Movies will intentionally pick certain actors and actresses simply because of their "Blockbuster draw" AKA the height of their celebrity. Not being a celebrity and the public not being interested in your life is ultimately a career killer for so many. To say they don't care is untrue, they do care if they care about their career.

It's just a shame, because it's slowly killing the movie industry itself.

Monday, July 5, 2010

This is Why We Need Real Doctors

Homeopathy: failing harder than ever before with a new male viriginity test.

There's no science to back this up. There's no reason to assume this ONE WOMAN'S claims are correct. She happened to notice red spots on men's ears when they told her they were virgins? Oh yeah. That's conclusive.

Let's also consider the fact that these men potentially raped women. Now they're out on the loose, and these women's stories, as opposed to this random acupuncturist's crazy ramblings, are going to be ignored.

What the fuck, world. What the fuck.

For the sake of argument, I'd like to point out that even if these men DID have sex and were NOT virgins, that's also hardly conclusive evidence that they raped the women in these cases. Can we please take the conversation about the accused's and the accuser's viriginity out of rape trials? It doesn't mean anything.

Friday, July 2, 2010

"The emotional, sexual, and psychological stereotyping of females begins when the doctor says, 'It's a girl.'"

Part 5: The Future

There are two things I can learn from my experiences. I can learn how to think healthier about eating and my body image (over time, that has definitely happened, and I think it will only get better). I can learn how to pass the wisdom from these experiences on to my future potential daughter, because maybe she'll learn from my mistakes.

How do we raise our daughters today? How do we raise them to think healthy thoughts about eating, about sex, about their gender? It seems almost impossible. I sort of understand why some fundamentalist religious people homeschool their children. There's so many people out there in the world waiting to undo all the education you've done. Of course, I want my children to be exposed to different viewpoints, and I feel confident that if I do my job right, no matter what anyone says or tells them to feel, they will feel good about who they are and what they look like no matter what. It's just a little scary.

I read an interesting article once (that I'm having serious trouble finding, else I'd post it here) written by a women who considered herself a feminist and was trying to raise her daughter with the mindset I'm describing. However, she found that to be incredibly difficult, especially when one morning she took her daughter with her while she went to get her eyebrows waxed.

"Why, mommy, what's wrong with your eyebrows?"

Dammit. It wouldn't even have occurred to me. Now the little girl is going to go home and start looking for flaws in HER eyebrows. How do you explain some of this stuff to your children? You think you're the epitome of healthy thinking and feminist attitudes, and then you're 3-year-old child, of all people, is the first to point out your inconsistencies.

Honestly, I don't have a problem with makeup, with plastic surgery, with fashion, with any of that. Despite the fact that it all thrives on women feeling bad about themselves, I don't think that's necessarily where it needs to come from. For me, I just like controlling how I look. It becomes an expression for me, an outlook of artistic energy. And yes, sometimes I like my eyebrows to look different. Not because I think they're ugly, but because I'd like them to be different.

But is that something you can teach?

My hope is that my daughter keeps herself healthy. Given the medical history she's going to have just from my side, it will do her a world of good. My hope is that she always knows she's beautiful, and never obsesses about trying to look like anyone else. I hope she enjoys her body as a palette for whatever it is she wants to do: dye her hair, get tattoos, piercings, buy fashionable (or unfashionable) clothing. I hope she doesn't do it to fit in or to please other people's desires. I hope she does it because she wants to and likes the way she looks afterwards.

I just hope she loves herself.

Thursday, July 1, 2010

"Yes, some people say to me you're too skinny, but never a skinny person says that to me, only people who could lose a few pounds say that."

Part 4: Diabetes

I was at a math team competition, and I asked to see the bag of Oreo's to read the nutrition facts. This immediately started a few people on how I shouldn't worry about the calories and just enjoy myself. "I'm diabetic," I said, "I don't have a choice."

Diabetes is impossibly entangled with food. For those people who have issues with obsessing over food, a simple solution is to let it go and not pay attention to what they're eating. I can't do that. Everything I eat. Everything I put into my mouth, I have to count it. It's seems like obsession, but it's how I survive.

Doctor's appointments every three months, weighing me. Nutritionist appointments where my mother was criticized frequently for not feeding me enough or feeding me too much. It starts to feel like you're being scrutinized and poked and prodded to no end. Everybody has something to say. I'm eating too much, I'm not eating enough, I'm not eating "healthy" enough, I'm not counting what I'm eating right. This started an obsession with food, because clearly no matter what I did something would be wrong, but I was going to try.

In the past approximately 8 years (I kinda lost track) I've learned all about how starches affect my blood sugar. Basically, they're not worth it. Ignore how they're like, the base of the pyramid. It's almost impossible to eat a bagel and not feel sick later. I've learned that MSG is the food equivalent of satan. I've learned that pizza loves nothing more than laughing in my face.

It must be really nice to not have to worry about being healthy. It must be really nice to just eat what ever you want and therefore have a healthy relationship with food. I envy those that do. I would give up candy and sugary foods if it meant I didn't have to freaking count everything.

There's no stopping it, because it's all in a desperate attempt to control my blood sugar, an admirable goal. Everything I eat or don't eat affects it. Some people will insist that diabetics can eat anything, as long as they give themselves insulin. Others say it's best to limit your diet to less carby foods. I suppose if I was more obsessed about my insulin, I could focus on that instead, but that seems to work less than the food method.

Where do my feelings about my body fit into this mess? They don't really. No one seems particularly concerned about it. Where fat feminism ignores the physical affects, doctors seem to ignore the emotional. It's gotten better over the past couple of years. I've learned what to listen to and what to ignore. I can filter some of the crap from what's genuinely good advice. A lot of that comes from having found a non-judgmental doctor that gets how difficult it is to be healthy with my disease, despite the obsession over it.

I know yesterday's post became controversial because there are apparently some people for whom being healthy is not a priority. Honestly, the concept is just so foreign to me it hadn't even occurred to me. There are really people out there who don't think about what they eat? They don't let it bother them? They don't count the carbs and the calories and the protein and fat? They don't obsess over what they just ate for the next couple of hours, hoping they don't feel like shit because of it?

Sorry, yeah, I didn't get that.

Being healthy is more than a priority for me, it's a necessity, a way of life. Diabetes kills people. It kills people so much so that it's one of the leading causes of death in America. One of the only ways I have to take care of myself is to watch what I eat.

So you really want to tell me there are people out there unconcerned with their health? Well, more power to them, I guess. But maybe you can understand where I'm coming from. Why that just never registered with me as possible.

I'd really like to just tell myself I'm beautiful and let the rest of it go. But I can't let my obsession with food go. I have to deal with my issues differently from everyone else. For me, dealing with it has meant focusing solely on my health. It helps me keep my weight in a reasonable range without obsessing over whether or not I'm "pretty enough." It helps me take care of my diabetes while not spending too much time in front of the mirror, scrutinizing. Focusing on health has been my coping mechanism for my body issues. I want to be healthy, I have to be healthy, and if that keeps me from thinking about whether I'm fatter than the super models on TV, well, it's a start.